And failure knocks me down again
I’m reminded of the wrong
That I have said and done
And that devil just wont let me forget
In this life I know what I’ve been
But here in your arms I know what I am
I’m forgiven I’m forgiven
And I don’t have to carry
The weight of who I’ve been
Cause I’m forgiven
My mistakes are running through my mind
And I’ll relive my days, in the middle of the night
When I wrestle with my pain, struggle with my pride
Sometimes I feel alone, and I cry
When I don’t fit in and I don’t feel like I belong anywhere
When I don’t measure up to much in this life
Oh, I’m a treasure in the arms of Christ
By Sanctus Real
When I got down on my knees at a little altar to tell God I was sorry for all the wrong I'd done, that I was sorry for the woman I'd become, that I was sorry for all the times I let him down, I know there wasn't a waiting period, I know he forgot and forgave me at that moment. He never threw those mistakes in my face again. But, the devil has a way of making us remember every bad word we've spoken, every wrong decision we've made, every person we let down, every person we hurt, every toe we stepped on along the way, every bad choice, and every single mistake that ever crossed our path. He does remind me in the middle of the night; when I lay awake looking at my children I am reminded of all the pain I could have saved them from if I had followed God's plan for my life and not made the mistakes I did. That and all of those failures I've made in my life come to haunt me often and they tell me I'm not good enough, that I should just give up, that I'm never going to amount to anything and that I'm still not worth it and that may be all true except and I love this part "When I don’t fit in and I don’t feel like I belong anywhere - When I don’t measure up to much in this life - Oh, I’m a treasure in the arms of Christ." And I do feel alone and I do cry often when no one hears me, when my children have laid down to rest and its just me alone wondering if I'm doing right by my children. Except now as opposed to then I cry to Jesus and I tell him I'm lost and I need you to lead my way, I'm broken and I need you to fix me, I'm a mess and I need you to clean me up, and I can't do this on my own. And then every so often even though I have a long way to go and I'm not perfect he reminds me of who I am now. I may not be much, but I am the child of a King and I am a single, hardworking, independant mother who loves her children and more than that loves God. And I don't have to be reminded of my past everyday - it's where it needs to be and its where it is what it is MY PAST becasue IM FORGIVEN. For all of you out there who allows Satan to remind you of your past tell him to get behind you - tell him you don't have time for him, tell him he has no power over you now, tell him if he's got a problem take it up with your Father (Jesus).
And remember
YOU ARE DOING A GREAT JOB ON THIS SINGLE PARENT JOURNEY
God Bless You!
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